Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Random Picks - Pierre Balmain Amber Gris EDP

AMBER GRIS EDP - PIERRE BALMAIN - 2008 - FEMININE (SHARED)




First time when I smelled this fragrance I had a somehow thought of golf players. 




Elegant men in cashmere sweaters and argyle socks, upscale country clubs with selected members...caddies holding leather golf bags, metal clubs, wood clubs...something elegant, quiet, something GQ magazine would approve...
Than it became a little bit louder...a caddy bagging the socialite in a private bungalow? Caddyshack style?



and finally it hit me! Pierre Balmain is to me just like Golf's love-and-hate experience to comedian and "golf-a-hole-ic" Larry David - click HERE for the entire article - New Yorker magazine.

First stage - anger - "There was a time when I was always angry on the course. Driving fast in the cart. Throwing clubs. Constantly berating myself. “You stink, four-eyes!"

Back to Ambergris EDP - "You are not a real ambergris fragrance, you say you are but you are not!! I will break this bottle... I must say the cap looks like a golf ball, but the perfume, not a hole-in-one! I am feeling cheated...

Second stage - denial - "The Anger phase lasted for years, and then I entered the next phase, Denial. “All I need are some lessons,” I told myself. “Why should everyone else be able to do it and not me? Why are they good? I’m coordinated. I have a jump shot! I can go to my left. Obviously I have it in me".

Ok, it is not a real ambergris but it is wearable...kinda nice...flowery, rubbery, slightly woody and slightly animalic...people bought it and gave sorta nice reviews... I am not even an ambergris fan...to much sex involved there...

Third stage - bargaining - "The third stage was Bargaining, and I did my share of that. “Please, God. All I want to do is hit the ball. What is it You want? Good deeds? Give me a swing and I’ll give You good deeds up the wazoo. I’ll help sick kids, the homeless . . . well, sick kids. I’ll stop all the mocking. I’ll give up cookies, coffee, coffee cake, cashmere".

All I wanted was to try to like an ambergris fragrance...a real one...what did I do to you Mr. Balmain? Give me one and I promise you a good review...pleeease?

Forth stage - Depression - "Then I drifted into the next stage, Depression. I was never going to be good. Never. Think what I could’ve done with all that time. Learned French. Piano. I’d be playing Chopin now if it weren’t for golf".

Never!!! this is never going to be good... I would be playing Chopin by now if I wasn't wasting my time here with this fake fragrance...

Last stage - "And now I find myself in the final stage, Acceptance. I will never be good. There, I said it. I like saying it. I’ll say it again: I’ll never be good. It’s just not something I’m suited for. That’s O.K. I’m good at other things".

It is just one more commercial perfume...so what? If you like it, be my guest to wear it and have fun...It is something that does not suit me...I prefer other things...





5 comments:

Lyubov said...

Ha! You are not alone here!
Not my abregris either...
But I actually do love Jolie Madame!

Anonymous said...

To me this one smells like an updated version of Aramis Tuscany Donna, remember this? And I laughed so hard reading your piece because this is exactly how I reacted to Balmain Carbone. It got such good reviews that I bought it blind, I tried to convince myself I liked it, I got mad and then gave it to a friend.

+ Q Perfume Blog said...

I guess Balmain is not my thing after all...
Denial was the funniest part of my day...

theperfumeddandy said...

What an amusing and original blog...
Now I've just acquired this and am waiting for it to arrive - I wonder what I'll make of this synthetic whale spittle.
In the mean time more power to your (golfer's) elbow.

Youre ever
The Perfumed Dandy

+ Q Perfume Blog said...

Dear Dandy, thank you. Your blog is also super nice and I am linking you here!

I think you will be stuck into depression stage for quite a while once you realize you won't get your money back...but i am curious to read your review!
XX

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